I sit here meditating upon the Holy Word – I read and listen to the words of Jesus to the people. He tells this parable, speaking to the self-righteous.
“”Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee, standing by himself, was praying thus, ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people: thieves, rogues, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give a tenth of all my income.’ But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even look up to heaven, but was beating his breast and saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’” – Luke 18:10-13
I want to be a man after God’s own heart. But, if I’m honest, more often then not, in these words, I feel the Lord’s eyes resting upon me.
How often I stand before God, righteously praying about all I’ve done for His Kingdom. In fact, my book – “I Knew His Voice” – is very heavily pointing out this ‘flaw’. When first diagnosed, I will never forget that my first prayer wasn’t one of humility and trust but was one of self-righteous indignation. “How did this happen? Look at all I’ve done for You…”
“How can one be pleasing to God when one is inflated with pride and self-love under the pretense of striving for God’s glory, while in fact one is seeking one’s own glory? When I see such a thing, it gives me very great pain. How can such a soul be united closely with God? Union with the Lord is out of the question here.” – Divine Mercy in My Soul # 1139
Thankfully, that isn’t where the story ends.
Through Divine Mercy and Grace, God has taught and continues to teach me to be more in the mind of the tax collector in the story. Knowing who I am, what I’ve done.
Yes, I am a sinner. If you knew all that I’ve done, you would cast me out. But, God does know everything. He looks at me, standing back, eyes downcast, and says, “raise your eyes, come to me. Accept My love.”
I want to be a man of whom God is proud. I want to be a man of His heart. I want to take the ‘Pharisee” prayer and raise my eyes to God, knowing that every single accomplishment in my life is His. Every reflection I post on the Road of Faith comes from Him. I want that when others look at me, they see Jesus. I want to give all my heart to God, not for myself or my own praises but for Him.
Only the Holy Spirit can make it so. Only the Spirit can change our hearts that dramatically. Only He can remove our stony hearts for new hearts.
If you see more of the Pharisee in the mirror, turn now to God and ask the Holy Spirit to change your heart. Give Him permission to transplant His Sacred Heart into your body.