“I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” – Romans 7:15
Why do I still sin? I’m a Catholic following Christ and am in the Sacraments – yet I still choose to do sinful things I know God abhors. Why do I do that to myself and to God?
Why can’t I now be the saint God created me to be?
We have to recognize that the Lord has led us to this point and that he has a plan for our lives, and so we need to be able to look back on our past to revisit our memories and ask that, God heal us and grow us beyond the various sins and vices that have plagued us. We need to be able to get to the point where we can thank Him, a place of peace where we can thank him for all that’s transpired.
I do think that, like, contrition on the one hand and thanksgiving, they kind of converge, and the recognition that, yeah, I’ve done bad things, I’ve done good things. But, the Lord’s led me to here, not so that I can congratulate myself, but in a sense because I ought to thank Him. I should praise Him for the relationship which I enjoy at present, which is His sovereign gift.
Every sin, every repentance has led us to where we are. We need to have peace of who we are now and of whom God is creating within us. When we can look back and see where we were or who we used to be, we can turn back and praise God for all He has done along our Road of Faith and then, maybe see more clearly the hand of God guiding us as we continue our journey along the road.