Sometimes faith is such a hard thing to hold onto. Sometimes it feels to me like my faith is a handful of fine sand, it slips through my fingers, so hard to grasp and hold. Then, add the winds of a storm in life’s challenges and it seems to just blow away. Your faith seems to be so hard to grasp and even when my hands seem so full of faith there is so much to blow it away and make it feel impossible to hold onto.
Can I persevere? Sometimes, I wonder. It feels like I am empty just struggling not to struggle or doubt. Just fighting to be the Catholic man I’m called to be. Be a saint? That dream seems so far away and impossible.
But, then as I sit in the valley of struggle, feeling everything is an uphill climb. I look around and see huge mountains surrounding me on all sides. Faith seems to teeter. Then, God reminds me that the valley is often the most fertile ground. In the valley one finds lush vegetation and cool springs. In the valley, trees grow tall, reaching with their branches to the sun.
With the realization that I am being fed in the valley by His spring, my faith grows.
CS Lewis wrote in the Screwtape letters ‘it is during such trough periods much more than peak periods that it is growing into the sort of creature He wants it to be’
In the valley is His eternal spring and as I gaze up I see His brilliant sun over the mountains. Snow capped beauty high atop their peaks. And, vigorously I begin the climb. I persevere in hope of standing again in His Light on top of those mountains.
Remember, no matter the valley or peaks or even darkest night of the soul – He is there. It is often in these times that Jesus is hammering away at the hardness of a soul’s heart to tear down the walls surrounding it.
In writing my book “I knew His voice”, I came to realize what seemed the deepest darkest time of my life was that fertile valley the grows faith. And now, praise God, I stand on the mountain peak, basking in the light, mercy and grace of our Lord. And through His blessings and strength “I knew His voice” and my blog (www.theroadoffaith.net) are allowing me to stretch my hand down the hill into the valley and pull others up.
Remember always that everything is for the glory of God and if we but just keep hope in Him who saves, we will be saved.
Just look at the cross or taste the Eucharist and never underestimate the power and love of Jesus Christ.
Beautiful Ed! Thank you for all you do to help others! Your blog uplifts me and touches me deeply!