The greatest Gift

”God is Love” 1 John 4:8

“Then I heard the words,  “I am glad you behaved like My true daughter. Be always merciful as I am merciful. Love everyone out of love for Me, even your greatest enemies, so that My mercy may be fully reflected in your heart”. Divine Mercy in my soul #1695

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.’  The second is this, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30-31

The greatest gift we have God is love. True Godly love is the ultimate goal and reward of our existence as man. It doesn’t matter what gifts you have, what blessings of life, or what you do, without love it adds up to nothing – 1 Corinthians 13

Through my life I didn’t love God, I knew of Him but nothing ever more that that. Without the love for God, or the knowledge of His love for me, I was incapable of truly loving anyone, well, maybe with the exception of self. I had faint shadows of love in my life, mostly they were twisted into a self-centered pursuit. What could the person do for me? Or, what had the person done for me (recently)?

When I found God for the first time, I found a vacuum within me. I couldn’t understand God’s love because I didn’t have it within my heart. So, my first experience of God wasn’t seen as love but as fear. I didn’t see His Mercy, I saw only His Justice. The night I gave my heart to God for the first time, I prayed to give my life to Jesus and to make Him the Lord of my life. But, I didn’t do it from a desire of love. The driving force of my prayer was fear of Justice. I knew that if God came at that moment, He would look at me and all I’ve done (or not done) and cast me out. He would pour His love upon my family, those closest to me but for me, He would have no recognition. I came to Jesus on my knees that night in imperfect contrition – from a place of fear.

God used that moment as a farmer’s seed coming to life under the soil. To bring forth a harvest of love. Over the next decade, God showed His Love for me. In outpouring after outpouring of love, He slowly let me know I am His beloved son, nothing less than His most treasured. I mean this in total humility because only by His Love, Great Great Grace and Divine Mercy can this be true. He didn’t come to me that night and overwhelm me with His love, I wasn’t ready to believe it. He gave me a drop of His love that I may know His Presence, that drop might very well have been an ocean to a parched me for how refreshing it was to my soul.

Over the next year, He arranged numerous opportunities for me to witness and grow in His love. The biggest, most powerful for me were a men’s gathering, His call to me to start a men’s group, an invitation to a men’s Emmaus retreat, my first true confession and how He spoke to me through the Scriptures at Mass.

In that first confession I found that my Prodigal Father in Heaven was waiting for me. I remember telling the priest, Father Reardon (may he rest in peace), that I had been to confession before, a long time ago, but I desired this to be my first true confession. He led me through a life’s confession and then said two things that broke through all hardness of my heart. As he spoke the words of absolution and blessed me, I broke down in tears, for the first time ever, I knew how much God loves me. I felt fully immersed as the Ocean of Mercy washed over me. He amplified the words of mercy with his next action and words. He stood, came around the partition and gave me a hug, saying ‘welcome home’. This moment, these words still bring tears to my eyes.

In the period of just 20 years, God has shown me more love and mercy than any soul deserves. I look into the eyes of Love and Mercy and am drawn ever deeper into the full truth of that Love. The power of His Divine Mercy being poured into my soul has given me a strong desire to share the same with others. I want only to share this love and mercy that I’ve found with the whole world. And, until the whole world hears, I will strive to allow God’d Divine Mercy and Love to pour through me into that world.

“Then I heard the words,  “I am giving you three ways of exercising mercy toward your neighbour: the first – by deed, the second – by word, the third- by prayer. In these three degrees is contained the fullness of mercy, and it is an unquestionable proof of love for Me. By this means a soul glorifies and pays reverence to My mercy”. Divine Mercy in my soul #742