Lord, what did You say? I must have fallen asleep. I thought I heard You talking, maybe it was just a dream. I feel so lost and alone, speak to me again, Lord. How long have I been drifting? Speak Your words of salvation, I need peace.
“Jesus said to his disciples, “Sit here while I go over there and pray.” He took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and began to be grieved and agitated. Then he said to them, “I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and stay awake with me.” And going a little farther, he threw himself on the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet not what I want but what you want.” Then he came to the disciples and found them sleeping; and he said to Peter, “So, could you not stay awake with me one hour? Stay awake and pray that you may not come into the time of trial; the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Matthew 26:36:41
Advent begins in a year that has been so different from any other we have experienced. 2020 has by many accounts has been a most difficult and trying year. So many of our brothers and sisters have lost loved ones from Covid, many more have been ill from this disease. Fear has been promoted by our media and government. Sin is promoted more now than maybe anytime in human history. So many acclaim pornography and abortion at as good things that promote “my” joy and freedom. These are no longer looked as as sinful in the world.
We are in a time of darkness in which creation trembles.
The readings and Gospels of our daily Mass seem so appropriate to the times nearly as if written from the news headlines.
In all of the things spinning around us, God is calling us to wake up. He is asking us to remain vigilant and watch with Him. To stay strong in this night of challenge ahead and watch what He is preparing to do.
It can so difficult to stay vigilant through the long night.
My year in 2010 was a microcosm of what the disciples experienced with Jesus. All was normal until the diagnosis. Then, everything changed overnight. I felt so close to God through those long months. I watched Him do miraculous things, He came to my daughter and spoke directly to me as a friend. I was buoyed by His presence and my faith was strong. like Peter, I was ready for anything.
“Peter said to him, “Even though I must die with you, I will not deny you.” And so said all the disciples.” Matthew 26:35
But, the “night” was too long and when the moment of testing and perseverance came, like the disciples, I didn’t maintain my vigilance. I forgot all that Jesus had done and I “fell asleep” in that moment. Looking back now, it was but a moment but in that moment, it felt like years.
We must keep our vigilance through the long night. I guarantee you that the Lord is working and everything is going exactly according to His Divine Plan. In prayer this morning, I feel God is using 2020 as a wake up call for the Catholic heart. This Advent and Christmas season, He is striving to show us that the crib does not come without the cross just as the glory of the resurrection doesn’t come without a night in Gethsemane’s garden.
So, awake my soul! Awake all good Catholic hearts! The darkness of 2020 brings a reawakening of Catholic souls within our church. Hearts finally set fully ablaze with a passion of preaching God’s love, mercy and presence.
With this season, we will see Emmanuel, God with us. So join me as we sit here and pray as Jesus joins this great battle which leads to His Victory over the darkness and fear.