If tomorrow never comes

“But God said to him, “You fool! This very night your life is being demanded of you. And the things you have prepared, whose will they be?” So it is with those who store up treasures for themselves but are not rich towards God.’” Luke 12:20-21

I value my accomplishments and achievements in life. I am proud of my service to the nation and of my position at work. I work hard to reach goals, to be recognized and to get the ‘nice toys.’ Many of us do. But, does any of that matter?

“If tomorrow never comes” is an incredible song by Garth Brooks. And, honestly one upon which I try to base my life and how I live and deal with others, especially my wife, children and grandchildren. In the refrain of the song, he sings:

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day, That she’s my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

Several years ago, I listened to this song while reading my Bible. These words rang against the Lord’s words in Luke 12. We are not promised tomorrow, no guarantees are made. So many times you hear stories of loved ones going away to work and never returning home. So, that night, September 11, 2002, I cried as this anniversary tied together with Garth Brooks sang these words through the Lord’s voice into my heart.

“‘Do not be afraid….for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Luke 12:32,34

Have I tried in every way to show those most important to me how I feel and how much I dearly love them? They are my truest and purest treasure. The woman I am married to is my joy and “greatest pearl.” My family has shown me something I never knew, love.

The unpublished ‘introduction’ of “I Knew His Voice” tells the story of my first child’s birth. I explained how when I looked into her eyes, I finally understood what it meant to love and be loved. I understood at that moment the purest love as I gazed into her dark eyes that first time.

Years later, listening to this song while I read the Lord’s words from the Gospel of Luke, I understood the greatest treasure I possessed was my wife and kids. I also knew that the only inheritance I could leave them of any value was my love.

I resolved that day to live my life striving to insure that if my tomorrow didn’t come, they would have certainty of two things. First, how I feel about them. And, second, where I am. God made it clear to me that evening that if my time on earth were through, these truths would be their consolation. In that moment, they will miss me and be hurting. But, if I’ve left those two messages behind, the mourning will be tempered. They would know that I loved them, they would know that I am in Heaven with God and, being with God, they will know I still love them. And, in that moment, even though we’re apart, God will allow that love to connect us still. “ Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also”, our hearts will be united because the treasure is love.

So, I wrote letters to each and locked them in my safe to tell them these words that God gave to me. “Know that you have given me the treasure that carried me to God’s arms and hold onto this treasure you gave to me fully. Love. I will always cherish this gift.”

I know the power of these “last words.” I was in Okinawa and had called home to say hi before a typhoon hit the island. The last words my dad said to me, as he hung up the phone were “I’m proud of you, I love you, Ed”, and the last words I said to my dad were “I love you, too, dad.” A few days later I stood in the funeral home waiting to bury my dad. Two friends, also in the Air Force, rushed home to be there. My best friends through high school. One told me how he had been home a few weeks earlier and stopped by to see my parents. He saw my dad on the front porch. In the conversation, my dad told him that he had no regrets in life. He had a great wife, great kids who he was proud of and loved more than all in his life. I have no regrets, thanks to my dad’s words. He left me with the perfect consoling words, “I love you, Ed.” To this day, nearly thirty years later, I still hear these words and they fill me with joy. “I am proud of you, I love you.” And, I could not ask for more.

That is also why, I always tell each of them these magic words whenever we part or end a call or go to bed at night, “I love you.” It doesn’t matter if we are having an argument that might even still be unresolved. The last words they will hear before I part is “I love you.” Never leaving room, in case these are my last words.

“ I only know that I love and am loved. That is enough for me.” Divine Mercy in my soul # 1828