Luke 15:11-32 is my reflection this morning. We all know the parable Jesus told captures in these verses – “The Prodigal Son.”
I’m sure I’ve heard, read and reflected upon this parable as many times as you have. It is such a deeply rich story of love, forgiveness and mercy that our Lord told this day.
Today, the words of the wayward son strike me as I read and hit like a dagger to the heart. ““Then he came to his senses and said, ‘How many of my father’s hired workers have more food than they can consume, while here I am, dying of hunger. I will depart from this place and go to my father, and I will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Treat me like one of your hired workers.”” (v. 17-19)
I can’t help to realize I am just like this young man. He didn’t turn his eyes or heart back to his father because of love or contrite feelings of sorrow. He looked homeward only because he wanted something from his father. He was hungry, homeless and destitute. He planned his speech and return all around the hope of being fed and housed.
When I came back to the Father, I did the same thing. I looked to God not in true sorrow for what I had done, but, for the need of being under His roof. Taken care of and ‘fed’. I did have some sorrow for the sins I had committed, and like this son, that sorrow made it that much more difficult to return. Fear of his judgement held me back but being destitute (spiritually) drive me to return.
Oh, but when we returned! Fearfully walking down that road, the Father was waiting. He came running to me and as I hit my knees to beg the Father to take me in, He grabbed me up in a loving embrace. No condemnation or judgment even for the mortal sins I had committed. He poured out His tears of joy like an ocean of mercy upon me.
It took some years for me to move from that totally imperfect, ‘fear of Hell’ contrition to a more perfect contrition. And, never was my move because of my efforts. My move to see the Father for His love and mercy and to desire to give back to Him love was 100% His doing. God the Father just kept (and keeps) loving me.
Do you struggle with being away from God due to your life choices? Have you squandered His grace and gifts on wrong living? Have you taken all God gave you and run away like a bandit to claim it as your own?
It doesn’t matter. God loves you. Still loves you. Desires you to come home. He is waiting and watching.
“And fear nothing, dear soul, whoever you are; the greater the sinner, the greater his right to Your mercy, O Lord.” Divine Mercy in My Soul # 598