“We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28
“In prayer I always find light and strength of spirit, although there are moments so trying and hurtful, that it is sometimes difficult to imagine that these things can happen in a convent. Strangely, God sometimes allows them, but always in order to manifest or develop virtue in a soul. That is the reason for trials.” Divine Mercy in My Soul # 166
“But I want you to know that I will affirm your soul to such a degree that even if you wanted to be troubled, it will not be within your power.” Divine Mercy in My Soul # 169
Troubling times come often even in the least expected days and holiest appearing moments. When we draw close to God, we maintain a peace in our soul. As soon as our attention waivers, that peace can falter.
“You shall strive to maintain a profound peace in respect to your communings with Me. I will remove all doubts in this regard. I know that you are at peace now as I speak to you, but the moment I stop talking you will start looking for doubts.” Divine Mercy in My Soul # 169
In the weeks prior to Kristina’s illness diagnosis, God gave me great armor in Romans 8:28. Then, when she was first diagnosed, after my temper at God settled, God spoke to me in order to give me His peace, telling me to trust Him. He gave me many messages of deep trust and His presence. It was in these these of great consolation that the night of trial came.
Like Jesus told St. Faustina, as long as I kept listening to Him, focused upon His words, I trusted. But, I allowed the times to wear at my resolve and I stopped listening to His consoling words calling me to trust.
I fell – I condemned myself for failing to trust. My soul aches in the pain of my transgression. Why would I, how could I have allowed this? God had His plans – His ways are higher than ours (Isaiah 55:9). It was in and through these days of trial that God taught me what true faith and trust were. His love and mercy confirmed in me a trust that in unwavering. A trust that would never have come if not for the dark night.
God uses all things, even the dark night through which you walk, the sin you regret, even Eve and Adam’s fall for His Glory. He bring glory in His Name by redeeming your soul.
Are you walking in darkness now? Are you struggling with your faith? Comment to this post and let me pray for you. I can keep your comment private if you desire. Let my wife and I and all the Road of Faith lift you in prayer that you may see how God uses even these times for greater glory and to build your trust.